I went shopping for work clothes on Tuesday.

Because I own basically two types of outfits: church dresses and skirts, and workout clothes.

Not because I work out, but because I like to slouch around in workout clothes while I’m working.

You get the picture. You’re probably either jealous or appalled.

It’s been a good run. But now I have to arrive at a workplace, for awhile at least, in something presentable. And here’s how it went.

1. Denial: I can’t go shopping. I haven’t been clothes-shopping in ages. I don’t even know where the stores are.

2. Anger: These crappy weird eighties clothes cost how much?!?

3. Bargaining: Do these shirts make me look like a Target mom? I’ll make you cookies if you say no.

4. Depression: How come nothing fits me post-three-kids? Why did my boobs migrate to my hips?

5. Acceptance: Coming home with three bags of clothes, all of which Kate has approved.

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4 Responses to The five stages of shopping grief

  1. Lauren says:

    This was epic. If you were still doing your writing gig I’d tell you to shop this one around. It is so true. I went last night to find something for Texas that a.) doesn’t have holes in the knees or b.) stains on the front and I can totally relate. I, however, did NOT come home with three bags of clothes. 

  2. Amy says:

    Even though I’m not in the market for work clothes, I completely relate to the above stages, with the exception of 5.  I’ve deciced I don’t know how to shop any more.  I’d be in real trouble if I did have to look work ready!  Glad you found some stuff.  Maybe you can write a fashion post for the rest of us frumpy mamas!

  3. Gretchen says:

    The three bags was a fluke. I got a few shirts, some tights/leggings, a new purse because my $1 thrift store purse’s handles were cracking off, two dresses (one on clearance!) and a sweater. Considering how horrible the trip was, I was elated to come home with so much! And now I should be good for, oh, the next five years or so. 

  4. Kellee says:

    Oh my!   This is making me laugh. I have the exact same problem.  On my 39th birthday I bought my first pair of skinny jeans and it was the strangest feeling.  I couldn’t find much else either.  Maybe a fashion lesson is in order for our trip!